My masseuse clearly paid attention in class – likely taught by monks. She was a by-the-book traditionalist like my high school French teacher. Mrs Myer used to say, "I'm here to do the work. You should come in here ready to do the work, or don't come." She was the Debbie Allen of high school French teachers, "If you want French, this is where you start paying… in conjugations and sweat…"
My Thai masseuse from Chiang Mai is of the same ilk. If I wanted to be relaxed, I was going to pay – in pain, as she pushed, pulled and stretched by body in ways that had me desperate for the whole thing to end. She could tell which spots hurt – and then she hurt me somewhere else to make those spots better.
Skillful in her work, my masseuse used different points in her combination of relaxation and torture to find out who I was, why I spoke Thai, what I thought of Chaing Mai (where she's from), where my wife and kids were and exactly what I knew about Thailand. Once I had passed her series of tests, I was allowed into the inner circle – mostly meaning that she and her coworker could go back to gossiping about people openly in Thai.
"And these girls, these young Thai girls fall for these stupid, fat, smelly, lazy Germans and they think they've hit the jackpot. But they're sleeping with some 55 year-old man and for what? They. think it's going to work out – but it's not. I tell them, but they don't listen. And then when they get their hearts broken and they aren't married – they come sobbing. But that's how it works. I hate Germans," was the rough translation to her smack-talking.
At one point, a roughly 55 year-old German man came over to inquire about being next in line for a massage and it was clear to see from where the massage ladies' ill feelings stemmed.
"You give me massage in five minutes!" the man practically yelled into one of their faces.
"We not ready – we tell you when we done. You can be next" said my masseuse's coworker.
"You give me massage when?! In five minutes?! Five minutes, you done?! Five minutes?!"
The two perturbed massage ladies chatted quickly amongst themselves figuring out the most accurate waiting time to give this man they had begun to hate. Finally, I heard them saying in Thai, "Fifteen minutes. How do you say fifteen minutes?! Is it five?"
I chimed in. "Fifteen! Tell him fifteen minutes!"
They did and after confirming loudly in their faces several more times, the man walked away.
"The foreigner did it! Foreigner helped!" (meaning me)
"The Foreigner is here to help! Anytime!" I said creating an uproar of laughter.
Apparently being an American – or anything other than German – is a good thing to be on Khao Lak Beach.
Germans may have been singled out in this situation, but the truth is that Thailand is a veritable United Nations of tourism and different towns and even beaches or neighborhoods within those towns have followings among various nationalities. It just so happens that Khao Lak is a German enclave. Businesses around here cater to Germans which means the local supermarket has an incredible selection of dark breads, cheeses, beer and coffee – while they run slim on any protein source that isn't ham or sausage.
In every Thai tourist spot, you could substitute what my masseuse said with the words French, Italian. English, American, Russian, Israeli and more. But what has been most surprising this trip – particularly in Bangkok and on our boat trip yesterday – has been the number if Indian travelers. They seem to come more often as couples, if not families – and so perhaps the foreign man/Thai girl issue that plagues most tourist-driven Thai locales isn't as prevalent with Indian travelers. But they present a whole new set of cultural rubs and challenges for Thais to address.
But this quick peek into the cultural and workplace issues of the Thai working class was really my only inter-cultural interaction of the day. The rest of it was spent either watching the kids play in the swimming pool at our house or at Khao Lak Beach where we all went for the afternoon and evening. There is little to say specifically about Khao Lak. The beach looks and feels very similar to Ko Chang where we went last year and really numerous other Thai beach venues I've visited before. It has beautiful white sand; warm, calm water and numerous places to rent a lounge chair and have food and drink brought to you. The only notable difference between Khao Lak and other Thai beach destinations in Thailand is that this one is more expensive. The beaches have a much higher proportion of pricey, new resorts and the median age is much higher than most places – perhaps at about 55. Being 41 with a family makes us not unusual here and surprisingly, we are not "old" as we were on Ko Chang and would be in most other popular vacation spots.
After paying a ridiculous amount for our "sunbeds" (aka lounge chairs), we settled in for a very fun day of fun and play in the sun. The kids dug, built and played in the sand for the majority of the afternoon broken for moments of swimming, special one-on-one walks with Emily and of course, lunch. It was a day full of laughter and play – and real relaxation for all of us.
Sennen and Ailyn were working so consistently and diligently on some kind of sand building project that the nearby German families came to know them . When we left, a large group of 60-something German travelers yelled and waved goodbye to our kids, calling them by name. And there was a brief moment of irony in the resort swimming pool when Sennen asked Emily and I why Zaide (Emily's dad, who was born to Holocaust survivors in a displaced persons camp) and his parents moved from Germany to America when Zaide was three years-old.
"Why did they think America would have a better life for them?"
"That's complicated…. maybe we can talk about that another time…."
After watching a gorgeous sunset, we moved to a restaurant down the beach for dinner followed by a quick trip to the supermarket, and then home. Somehow the time had slipped by and it was 9 pm when we arrived back at our house. Ailyn fell fast asleep in the sangthaew taxi on the ride home and had to be woken to shower. She was a crying wreck, but fell asleep nearly instantly after we got her ready for bed.
The end of each day in Khao Lak has ended in complete exhaustion, but following days filled with fun and adventure for all.
"Dad, we had some great adventures today!" Sennen said as his head hit the pillow. But of course, his best line of the day was for Emily, "Mommy, I will remember this day forever. I loved spending special time with you."
And instantly, it's all worth every dime.
