"After tomorrow, everyone will leave. This island will go from 3,000 of us to 1,000," the nice young waiter from Ktima Petra whose name I sadly don't remember told us. We ran into him while he was making courier deliveries near my house. Why? His cousin is on medical leave and since the restaurant their family owns is closed this time of year anyway, my waiter friend is filling in.
It turns out the last day of school is tomorrow and then it's exodus for all the families taking their winter vacations – not to mention the teachers who are mostly on assignment here anyway.
"Most of the stores will close after tomorrow," the friendly woman who owns one of the more expensive boutiques told us. She herself will shut her shop and goes to see her family in Northern Greece.
As I sat at Petrino – the cafe in the town square – realizing it was closed, Manolis The Organic Shop Owner's wife came walking by with their toddler son and told me Petrino's last day for two months was yesterday. However, if I want coffee, Manolis can make me some – he always has coffee. I didn't explain I was more interested in the outdoor table and comfortable chairs Petrino left out than the actual coffee – in fact Petrino's closure may save me some serious money over the next few weeks.
George at Sagitarius says the big exit is tomorrow night on the midnight Blue Star Ferry. Then, the streets will be quieter than now – which is already hard to imagine.
Some Patmians like this time of quiet best – like my Ktima Petra turned courier friend and Manolis who keeps his shop open until January 5th when he then takes a two week break.
Others seem to find it unnerving. Coach Thanasis who owns the gym told the kids this summer that Winter on Patmos is very, very boring. Elaina who works at the back pharmacy (I refer to the two pharmacies at the back and front pharmacies based on their position in town). invited Michelle for coffee because Elaina has to work through the holiday season and she's already bored and fearing it will only get worse as people leave.
My favorite bakery lady at the Christopolous Bakery seemed lukewarm about spending the holidays on Patmos - but has to work. In a conversation that never would have happened in summer, she told me about her recent divorce after 23 years of marriage and how she was ready to leave Patmos just to for a change of pace when she fell into an unexpected relationship and decided to stay. She said her new boyfriend has been a gift and their new relationship has brought an unexpected joy – just when she needed it. So while she would rather go somewhere for Christmas, she's also content to enjoy a quiet one with her boyfriend.
In turn I shared with the bakery lady that my 2022 Spring sojourn here was during a trial separation from my now ex-wife. That helped her put together the story and we commiserated briefly. Then we agreed Roxakia are the best of all cookies.
After years of pleasantries and the casual chit-chat one has in a store you frequent, we shared an open-heartedness one rarely has in a bakery.
The same thing happened last night when I picked up souvlaki from Alas, the local grill and gyro restaurant. Tassos the twenty-something waiter, who I've known now for a couple of years – and who has fond memories playing at my house with the kids of the family who owned it then – said Alas will close on the 30th for two months. This is uncharacteristic. Normally Alas closes for one to two weeks to give the family who owns it a quick vacation, but this year they have work to be done on the restaurant.
Tassos doesn't mind. He'll take a week in Athens and then two weeks in Switzerland. He said he likes to see places with a "true winter" and is very excited about the trip. That said, he said his time staying with friends in Athens is often more restful. I was surprised because what could be quieter and more restful than Patmos? I figured for a young person like Tassos, Athens would provide energetic contrast and he might enjoy shopping, movies and nightlife.
It turns out Tassos craves anonymity.
"Some days in Athens, I stay home all day. I sleep, I do what I like. If I go out, nobody knows or cares. I can go wherever and it's private. Not that I want to go and do anything illegal. Just it's private – it's for me," he explained.
On Patmos, if he sees a friend, it's likely his family knows before he gets home. Everyone is so networked.
Most importantly, Tassos rebels by not talking to people from Patmos if he runs into them around town. He said so many Patmians go to Athens around the holidays, so running into them periodically happens.
"But if I don't want to stop and talk with them here – if we're not really friends – why should I talk to them just because we're both from Patmos?"
In Athens, Tassos is free. It may not be the life he wants to live year-round, but it's something he values greatly in doses.
In turn, Tassos asked me about my kids, how Emily and I split custody and my girlfriend.
Again, this was an open-heartedness one rarely has while ordering take-out and something nearly impossible during the summer when Tassos hustles and sweats taking care of all the customers. Making sure I get the yogurt sauce instead of the mustard sauce with my chicken souvlaki is as personal as it gets on an average summer night.
The time I spent on Patmos during the Spring of 2022 bought me a lot of street cred here. The first half of my ten weeks was before any tourism – which made me stand out. I got access to the community in a different way than in summer. Buying a house has further established my place in Patmos society, even though I'll always be a foreigner.
While it's too early to be sure, it feels like I'm in a Total commercial: it takes ten weeks of Spring to equal the amount of Patmos street cred of just one week of Winter!
We even got a dinner invitation from Christina and Dimitris from whom I've been renting cars for years. They live just down the "street" and have always been warm and friendly. I guess between the number of years, the amount of time I spend here, us being neighbors and them having time in Winter, they've decided to have us over. It's extremely kind.
So what does it all mean? Who knows. We'll see what life feels like Friday after The Sudden Departure. And truthfully, I may not know what this time means for my Patmos relationships until Summer or even beyond. Things have to unfold. That said, you can't take back a moment. The bakery lady and I will always be a little changed from our conversation – as will Tassos and I. I can't imagine my first dinner in a Patmian home means nothing.
Relationships are built largely through shared experiences. I'm here when both Patmians and I have time to share. We'll see what happens.
Today's "office"
