They’re Just Boys Like Me

"Daddy, stay here," Sennen said as he entered the basketball court.

"Ok, go! Now! Go…" he mouthed as he motioned only a minute later, right after sitting on the bench near a few other kids. Others were shooting and passing to one another. Sennen wasn't ready to enter the fray of maybe 12 boys ages 12-15, but sitting next to a few other boys was within his capacity, so he did it. That's when he realized being the only kid with his dad there was not cool – so he dismissed me, which I fully expected.

I walked the seven minutes home half expecting Sennen might show up a few minutes behind me. But he didn't. Instead he came home an hour and fifteen minutes later hobbling with a scratch on his nose. He tripped and fell during a running and shooting drill and twisted his ankle – but not until almost the end of practice. I was afraid the fall – whether by negative association or embarrassment – would taint the experience. It didn't. 

Sennen reported basketball was fun and a social success. He said all the boys were nice. Some were very welcoming, speaking English to him. At the very least, no one was rude or mean – which in a group of middle school-aged boys is really like saying they're saints. In fact, Sennen had such a good time he said that if his ankle didn't hurt, he wanted to go out to the town square to see if he could find any of the guys he had just played with. It had gone far better than even the best outcome I had imagined.

Apparently, one kid was bilingual, having lived in Liverpool for some period because his dad was working there. Another also spoke strong English. Yet a third didn't speak much English, but learned Sennen's name and called for him to join in things.

"They're a really nice group of kids," Sennen told me and Ailyn over dinner. "I was so anxious going there. I don't know why I was so worried. I realized they're just boys like me and it didn't matter so much. Now it's great!"

I told Sennen most people would feel uncomfortable joining a social situation in which they were the only foreigner and couldn't speak the local language – and how I proud I was that he took it on and did so well. On the way to the basketball court earlier, I also pointed out that what he was experiencing is what the ESL kids in his classes over the years probably felt like starting school. It takes some bravery to enter a different linguistic and cultural world.

All of this was on the heels of meeting Pantelis – not Ulysses as I had misheard. We stopped by the laundry just two hours before the basketball game and Sennen met twelve-year-old Pantelis, who was nervous to speak English at first, found his English voice as Sennen used Google images as he shared about Los Angeles and the differences in the beaches and the Walk of Fame, etc. Pantelis laughed a lot and clearly thought giant cities and beaches with big waves were crazy. Disneyland meant nothing to him. However, pancakes from The Griddle caught the attention of both Pantelis and his older sister, Theologia. Pantelis likes soccer better than basketball and seemed interested to play soccer with Sennen sometime. It didn't appear to be two best friends finding each other, but it was a nice social intro and you never know where it leads. 

After dinner, a shower and his ankle pain abating, Sennen said he was excited for Tuesday's practice. I was thrilled. 

Meanwhile, both kids were very happy with their workout with Coach Thanasis at 5pm. They've been seeing him since they were four and six respectively and there's definitely a mutual admiration. Every time I text Thanasis to arrange sessions, he tells me what great kids I have and how much he enjoys his time with them. They came home from the gym saying it was the best workout ever. They did treadmills, squats, some weights – I couldn't figure out what was so amazing about it on a literal level. I think it's the good time they have while doing it.

Between swimming, Coach Thanasis twice a week and basketball practice twice a week, the kids have been active seven days a week. They've had dessert only once since arriving and eating fruit instead for snacks and to satisfy their sweet tooth. They have proclaimed the local watermelon to be as good as Gelson's black watermelon – which is a very high distinction! We're cooking dinner at home four to five nights a week – some of which include barbecuing. We still have three weeks and a day ahead of us in which anything can happen – but I feel like we're on track for a very healthy Patmos summer this year – physically and potentially socially too.

Yesterday, Ailyn looked tired coming home after a hot two hours of work stamping bags. However, today when, as requested, she took her handwritten timecard to the shop to get paid, she came home very pleased with herself and the feelings of being hot or smelling like oregano seemed to dissipate. She had 35 euros and she was a happy girl. Monday, both kids report for work. I'm grateful to Eirini and Allessandro – the kids' little summer jobs are so valuable and foundation building.

I couldn't be happier. If I can foster a summer of growth – especially one in which the kids are taking on more responsibility and enjoying greater freedom – I feel it makes it a summer well spent.

Saturday is a "day off" for us all. So we're back at Kampos enjoying a cool breeze and refreshing water on a not-quite-as-hot-as-yesterday, but still hot day. The signs of peak tourist season are here – more sounds of Italian being spoken and the sunbeds at Kampos going from 10 to 15 euros – a price I don't intent to pay that often, especially since it's not even my favorite beach. But as a family-friendly beach, it commands the highest prices, with Atmos Cafe (where I'm sitting writing) charging 60 euros for a set of sunbeds! Outrageous!

Luckily, there is a beachgoing loophole locals use and which I have observed – if you don't like the subbed price and you don't want to sit in the "free section" of the beach with your own towel or beach chairs, sit at the cafe and order a beverage or two here and there. A cappuccino costs 3 euros and the custom is to allow people to sit and socialize as long as they want. No one has a problem with people going from their cafe chairs for a dip in the ocean and returning. I have used this loophole at Agriolivadi many times because I actually like the cafe there so much. This may become a Kampos strategy.

It doesn't take a basketball court to learn from the locals….